Five things I learned last month: I learned that even the best laid plans can change. The best thing to do is just tuck & roll with it until you see what you bump into.
I learned that my Stella may be braver than I thought. She got her ear pierced…in the cartilage part. They told me to come into the punchering room with her but after a quick scan of the waiting room I said “H3ll no!!! I will wait. There is no one here big enough to pick my rather large caboose up off the floor, thank you.”
I learned that my 14 year old female Chihuahua’s can still go into heat and our neutered male has no idea that he lost his marbles around 1 year old. If I were a scientist, I would be learning how to bottle that libido. I can see dollar signs.
I learned that twitter is not for me. I might be too old for it. I am long winded and it is sort of like talking to my husband. It refuses to let me finish my sentences!
And finally, I learned that no matter how old you get your life is rich when you have someone to share it with…………….
But How Did They Get Here?
While waiting on my car to be fixed a little old man and little old woman walk in. She can hardly stand or walk. Her steps are mere inches apart. It took her a good 15 minutes to walk 25 feet. Her little legs have bruises and sores on them. He is much much quicker and races ahead to open the door for his honey. They finally get in and set down in the waiting room. After a few seconds the Mister says to the Wife, ‘Honey where are we again?’ She reminds him they are at the car dealership getting their vehicle repaired.
She gets all settled in and whopped out her crossword puzzle and he asked, ‘Honey where did you say we are again?’ She looks annoyed and yells at him, ‘IN THE WAITING ROOM.’ He looked enlightened but embarrassed. A few minutes later he says, ‘There she is honey, there she is.’ Wife looks around the corner surprised at the speed in which they repaired the damage. She looks back at him again with the eye. She then informs him, ‘We drove the truck in today. That is not our car it is not even the right color.’ She went back to her crossword he twiddled his thumbs.
All of a sudden I realize he is in the throes of dementia.
‘Honey, I have to go to the bathroom.’ She gives him directions. When he stands up she grabs him and informs him he forgot to zip his pants this morning. She then gave me the eye, I divert my gaze to escape her daggery stare. She grabs him by the waste, and fixed his britches like he were a kid, then sends him on his way….. alone.
Time passes and he is nowhere to be seen. I start getting a wee bit nervous but my eyes remain fixed on my newspaper. Correction my upside down newspaper.
He returns and sits down again. ‘ Honey, did you say we are at the doctors office?’ She ignores him. Then she says, ‘My legs are hurting so much today.’ I take a quick glance to see her poor little swollen legs, ugly. She tells him she is going to take a pain pill and with that she gulps a couple down in one swift swallow. He says, ‘Okay dear what ever you need.’
A PAIN PILL! Then all of a sudden it hits me, My lawd, how in the world did they get here and more importantly how are they getting home??
Two hours, one more trip to the bathroom, and many more questions later the car Tech brings them their keys. The tech tells them they had to order one little part so they will have to bring it back. Apparently, they damaged a part near the opening of the gas tank when they drove off with the nozzle still installed in the tank! I thought that only happened in the movies. Mister asked Wife, ‘Honey would you like to drive this time?
WOULD YOU LIKE TO DRIVE THIS TIME????? Lawd help us all.
My tech has just walked in and tells me basically the same thing. My part has to be ordered and I will have to return. NO, I did not run off with the pump. We are all standing there getting our stuff ready to roll but I just can’t leave until I find out who is driving! I sit back down acting as if I had an important text to take care of and waited. Unfortunately, the Wife is so slow in getting out of the waiting room that my presence was starting to look a little odd so I went to my car.
Wait for it….wait for it. Mister and Wife emerge.
He is holding on to Wife’s little arm then all of a sudden he shoots off toward the truck yelling , ‘SHOT GUN!’ This truck is not just any old truck, it is a Monster Truck with a 3 foot lift kit and monster tractor tires on it! Needless to say, I was in shock. Wife was left to hobble behind. She finally made it to the truck and stood there. Her Mister jumped out of his seat ran around and hoisted her up into her seat. He then ran back to his side, jumped in and away they drove off both wearing grins!
Until next time, keep looking for the fun in life with the ones we have. Because even if our love ones drive us crazy, they also could be the ones that drive us home….with a grin.