aMusing Mondays: Flying Things or Drunk on Bug Juice

If you follow my blog, you have read about my dogs Mutt and Jeff. You also know that I have changed their names to protect the not so innocent. Maybe it is time you put a face to the pseudonym. Mutt is the big one. She is a cross between goofy and gentle. I bet you thought I was going to give you a couple of breeds didn’t you? Jeff is a tiny Pomeranian. He is not a cross between anything. He is straight up bossy, which can lead him into the wrong direction and that brings me to this week’s story…

Shortly after moving into our home we adopted Jeff. He was born head strong. He always walked his own path and was just plain hard to warm up to. He was and still is a strange dog with some odd peculiarities. When he was a baby he only wanted to be petted with your feet. Petting him with your hands would drive him crazy and not in a good way. Lord forbid you pick him up that would send him over the edge. Some of his peculiarities have disappeared over the years, some intensified and some are the same like hating ANYTHING that flies. Birds, bees, flies, you name it, if it flies he wants to catch it, defeat it and eat it. Many, many days I would be cleaning the kitchen, look out the window and see this crazy dog running in circles barking and jumping in the air for no apparent reason. (I always looked to see if the neighbors were watching him do this. They already think he is a little rabid he-devil. Seeing Jeff perform this ritual would seal the deal.) After closer inspection, I realized he was chasing little flying insects. It seems his favorite were little sweat bees. Many times he would come in the house after a good day of chase with a blown up snout. Before I really knew what was causing it, I thought maybe allergies.

One evening I was sitting on the back porch with Mutt and Jeff. I noticed Jeff’s head bobbing back and forth. After a few seconds of bobbing, he would stand perfectly still then pounce the ground with his front paws. At first, I could not see what he was after but I could smell it. He had found a stink bug. It didn’t take long before I saw that it would crawl a little bit then try to fly. Of course, that would drive him crazy. Stink bugs have sticky legs with tiny barbs. They can hang on to anything for as long as they want. A few times it would stick to his snout. Oh my, that would send him into orbit. I kept telling him to stop messing with the bug. He would, for about 2 seconds, then go right back at it until I made him go in the house.

A few nights after that incident with the stink bug he was wanting out into the fenced back yard. I let him out while I stayed inside to watch a movie. Around 2 hours later, I noticed he was not back yet. I opened the door and found him sitting on the step staring into space . In he walked, then he stopped in the middle of the floor. As I watched him, I noticed something seemed to be stranger than normal. Not only was he now staring into space he was also swaying back and forth. You know that ‘dipping deep’ kind of swaying. The kind that almost looks like you’re leaning into a strong wind while trying to climb up a steep hill. Then without warning he reared straight up then fell over stiff as a board.

I FREAKED OUT! OMG What is going on? MY DOG! I raced over and held him in my arms crying like a baby. I could not figure out what was wrong but I did notice his breath. UGH! He had the strongest stink bug breath I had ever smelt. In no time at all, he popped out of it and was looking at me like, Why are you touching me with your hands??? He was so confused and so was I. Of course, Jeff could not tell me what he did so I went outside and looked around. Nothing, I found nothing but I smelt that nasty bug smell. I followed my nose until I came upon a hole in the ground. There I saw the remains of hundreds of dead stink bugs. Jeff had dug them up and eaten them. Apparently, stink bugs can make a dog drunk!

The next day he was showing no signs of illness. In fact, he was barking his brains out chasing another flying thingy. I ran out to make sure he did not have another stink bug. One heart attack a year is all that I can handle. As I got to him, I noticed it was not a stink bug but a poor little butterfly. It must have not been as exciting nor as enticing as the stink bug because he spat it out on the spot.

Until next time

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36 thoughts on “aMusing Mondays: Flying Things or Drunk on Bug Juice

  1. I hope you aren’t letting non-dog people read this piece. They will not understand us.

    What a fun way to start the day. Much better than getting to work on time!

  2. I’m sure there’s a twelve-step program out there for this very issue. “Hi, I’m Jeff, and I’m a stink bug-oholic.” “Hi, Jeff.” Just don’t let his sponsor try to pat him on the head!

  3. Pingback: Sleepy face | Kitten Thunder: Life lessons and cat tales

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